This is good.  Really good.  Watch it.  If you love intrigue, murder mysteries, great filming, and fine fine television, you should check it out.

So along with this I like film, as I mentioned, and I like to get the inside scoop on it occasionally.  So when I saw this documentary on PBS called “These Amazing Shadows” I had to check it out.  Problem was it was on late and I couldn’t finish it.  Luckily there’s now such a thing as streaming Netflix and they, YES!, had it available.  For anyone who loves film this is a great little documentary about the National Registry of Film connected with the Library of Congress, how it came about, what it is, how they pick the films, etc.  Got me interested enough to go to the website of the Library of Congress and check out the list.  It’s pretty good, and not at all what you would think.  Well, partially what you would think, but not completely.  There are some very cool entries on the list.  Documentaries, home movies, shorts, newsreels, etc.  As well as films that are famous and you would know.  Very cool.

So if you love film and have a bit of time this one is worth viewing.

Here are some of my most favorite of the quotes I found…

At the center of non-violence stands the principle of love. - Martin Luther King, Jr. 

I refuse to accept the view that mankind is so tragically bound to the starless midnight of racism and war that the bright daybreak of peace and brotherhood can never become a reality… I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word.

- Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, ‘What are you doing for others?’  - Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness.  - Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Nonviolence is a powerful and just weapon. which cuts without wounding and ennobles the man who wields it. It is a sword that heals.

- Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Nonviolence means avoiding not only external physical violence but also internal violence of spirit. You not only refuse to shoot a man, but you refuse to hate him.  - Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.  - Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think.   - Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.

― Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

People fail to get along because they fear each other; they fear each other because they don’t know each other; they don’t know each other because they have not communicated with each other.   ― Martin Luther King Jr.

It’s cycle ten, people. Can’t believe it. 19 months since this all started and only just over nine months to go. I saw my oncologist today. The every three month visit. I had a couple of concerns as my liver counts had been elevated for awhile. My GP even ordered an ultrasound last week to make sure everything was ok. The results came in last Thirsday and it was good. But the numbers were still high… She thought it might be my chemo meds, but since my cholesterol was also good on the lowered cholesterol med, and I’m on an eating plan and working out again, she decided to take me off the cholesterol meds completely to see what happens there. I’ll be tested in late March to see if I can stay off of them. It’s also less taxing on my liver to be off them.

So today… Met with my oncologist. My numbers, CBC and Metabolic panel, were all good. Even my liver numbers, save one, we’re all back in the normal. The one that wasn’t was barely elevated over high. And this was me…. Sigh…. Relief. My doc allayed all my anxiety, which always rears it’s head in a big way right before I have the quarterly. To say I get anxious doesn’t fully describe it… I’m usually afraid of the what if. Not rational, but true none the less. This is when Ativan is my friend. That and hearing him say everything is great and I’m doing fantastic. Yes brother… Thank you!

So here I am… Cycle 10. Two to go. Entering the realm of taking 9 ATRA a day for 15 days on top of the weekly shot and the daily 6MP I’m already taking. Headache… Here we go. Tylenol and staying hydrated… Both become my good friends. And before you think I’m complaining… I’m certainly not. ATRA saved my life… Along with hardcore chemo, the love of my honey, family and friends, and fantastic medical staff. So there’s no complaining out of me. Zip.

What there is… There’s a huge sense of being grateful, being alive, being blessed with more love from family and friends than I can measure. Life, this life.. My life… It’s beautiful. And I am thankful for it, and for the ATRA I start taking today.

Cycle 10, people…. I’m in the last several months of maintenance now. This life is a wonderful miracle and I am more fortunate than is possible to express. So ATRA… Let’s go!

Is this making sense?

I’ve never attempted to articulate this before, but yesterday I was looking at our living room.  Simple.  We both appreciate art, in many forms, and it’s evident in our space.  The furniture is even sort of funky, which is part of it.  We are eclectic, because we always get something because we love it, not because it’s what we should have to go with whatever else we have.  We figure if we love something it will fit into the whole of what our place is.  The vibe.  We also believe in not having too much “stuff” so we try to keep things non-cluttered.  It’s a balance of taste and style and funk and having our space feel a certain way.  So I was looking at it and found myself thinking and feeling that a certain aesthetic sense fills it.  It fills me.  Anytime we go anywhere I see photographs.  Not the usual panorama, though sometimes that’s so, but usually a part of something, the form of something, the way the light hits a particular thing.  I notice.  And I’m glad I do.  It’s what happened yesterday as a certain winter light shone in through our living room window and hit part of a lamp.  That’s all.  Just a little light filtering in and hitting a part of lamp.  It was stunningly beautiful.

I never get too busy to notice, never too rushed to notice, because even when I am busy or rushed I still notice as my eyes pass something.  It’s wonderful.  At least I feel as though it’s wonderful.  I feel lucky to have this thing inside that naturally lets me see the larger, deeper, subtler things in life.  The way a leaf blows across the street, the barking of a distant dog that sounds happy, the passing shapes in clouds, the shadows made by the rising of the sun.  I sometimes feel these things so much I cry.  Cry from a place of joy for having seen something so stunning.  It used to embarrass me, but it no longer does.  I feel privileged, and I wish more people stopped quietly and said to themselves…wow… that is beautiful.  Whatever that may be.  I think the world would be a better and more joyous place.  How could it not be.  It brings connection with things, connection with the larger world, makes a person feel small and a part of something bigger all at the same time.  It brings a sense of peace, that things are as they should be for a moment, these brief snippets of time.  It’s freeing in a way.

I feel fortunate, lucky, privileged, to see the world through these eyes… these eyes that see beauty in the smallest things all around me.   And my hope is that you see it too…

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Syndey Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 18,000 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 7 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

There’s something about these mornings… everything still.  I love this time.

I have always been a person who likes my quiet alone time.  No input, no talking, no one around.  When I lived alone I could spend entire weekends just staying in my apartment, hibernating, reading, watching TV, surfing the net.  I never felt alone or sad that I was.  I enjoyed it.  I had a busy life so getting those weekends to myself once in a while was a lovely thing.  Living in my head and my heart.  Regenerating my soul.

I still love time to myself.  I don’t get whole weekends anymore, and you won’t hear me complaining about it as the trade off now is spectacular, but I still like my time.  Luckily for me my honey gets it.  She doesn’t get offended when I say I need some down time.  When I say I need to have stillness… quiet.  Like now…

We had such a great two days over at the kid’s house.  A really lovely Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

Pierogi making and toy building and a walk and elf set up on Christmas Eve.  Such a nice day.  Karen makes a mean pierogi… or several of them.  So good.  A new Christmas Eve tradition is born.  From now on every Christmas Eve we will be clamoring for pierogi.  Yum.  After a walk, and food, and after the young gent went to bed we all went into elf mode.  Building toys and setting out his wagon and enormous zebra, later named Zeus.  The kids put together his easel.  All while Christmas music played.

Christmas day Karen and I opened our gifts to each other, and the gifts from Mom for the pups (they loved them… or, more accurately, Weston took to both of them and Riley hasn’t seen much of either since… LOL) while enjoying a quick cup of coffee.  We had to get it all done and then get dressed and head over to the kid’s house so we’d be there before the little guy was up and able to look at the tree.  We didn’t make it before he was up, but he hadn’t looked at the tree yet.  When that little man wakes up he thinks of only one thing… food.  He loves him some oatmeal and applesauce!

So he looked at the tree and the gifts and was overwhelmed.  In a good way.  We all opened, he opened some of his, and we enjoyed some cinnamon rolls. Then Martin made us lunch (pizza) using his new bread maker.  He makes some mean pizza dough and we made some yummy pizzas.  Then a walk (the young man rode in his new wagon part of the way and pushed it part of the way and cared less about it part of the way).  The walk was followed by more present opening for him, he got an unusually high number of presents… go figure.  It was fun.

After a full day Sebastian had a little dinner, played a little more, and then went up for his bath and bed.  Meanwhile the turkey was cooked (it had been started earlier in the day) and Karen and I set about getting the rest of the stuff ready.  The kids came back down and the table was set, the food laid out, the wine uncorked, and there we were… turkey dinner for the four of us with most of the trimmings.  A quiet really nice dinner.  We followed that up with a rousing game of Mad Gab, a game we’d gotten for them for Christmas.  It was totally fun.  At one point Mary and I were laughing so hard we were crying.  Good fun!

It was a beautiful Christmas this year.  Relaxed, fun, totally great.  As Mary said… it’s why we all moved to the same place.  So we could enjoy stuff like this while still getting to sleep in our own beds at night.  The best of both worlds.